The 3 Ways To Turn
Conversation Fear Into Courage!
by Peter Murphy
Have you ever found yourself in a social setting feeling awkward, stuck for words and unsure of what to say and how to say it?
Maybe you were at a large family gathering such as a wedding or a
birthday party. Regardless of the context you know the uncomfortable
feelings that can stop you from speaking up and enjoying yourself.
What can you do to beat conversation fear?
1. -- Be Yourself --
Take it easy and don´t put yourself under undue pressure to be the life
and soul of the party. Be yourself. And if that isn´t good enough for
some people then be selective and mix with people more to your liking.
It is your choice who YOU mix with so don´t be passive and leave it to others to decide if they want to talk to you.
You get to choose!
2. -- Respect Conversational Give And Take --
People tend to gravitate to people who are good listeners so don´t feel
that you have to talk until you are blue in the face. It is perfectly
acceptable to be quiet, to listen and to encourage others to talk.
Good conversation is about give and take so develop both of these
aspects of conversation skills. Start to get a feel for the dance of
conversation and the ebb and flow of how people interact and let the
conversation take on a life of its own.
You are only one of the players - give and take, talk and listen, lead and follow.
3. -- Deal With Fear --
We all have to deal with fear to improve the quality of our lives and
our social interactions. The secret is to transform fear into courage
by taking charge of our emotional states.
Thankfully, this is a skill anyone can learn and the implications for
your life are huge. Imagine, how you will eel when you can approach
even perfect strangers with an air of confident self assurance.
How good will that feel?
And imagine how great it will be to assert yourself with friends and family and still be friendly, caring and likeable.
Now, list your fears and eliminate them one at a time.
Start with the smallest fears first and gradually work towards dealing with the bigger issues.
Some suggestions for issues to deal with:
1. The co-worker who intimidates you
2. The neighbour you avoid but want to talk to
3. A friend who invades your space
4. A family member you don´t stand up to
All of these fear based people problems stack up and affect the quality
of your life. Master these situations one at a time and you will feel
like a new person.
You will feel more in charge of your life, respected, appreciated and even more dynamic.
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