Easy and Practical
Self Confidence tips
Everybody needs a confidence boost sometimes,
so here are a few tips...
1. Feel Good when you Want
When you need to boost your self confidence or self esteem, find 3
things that make you feel good. These could be memories of good times,
a piece of music, a holiday souvenir, or a person's face - use photos
if it helps. Practise thinking about them and bringing them to mind.
Developing self confidence that lasts - because of the way emotions
'attach' themselves to memories, you will quickly train yourself to
feel good when you want - a great help.
2) Beat Self Consciousness
Self consciousness is the No.1 enemy of self confidence. Learn how to
keep your attention off yourself. You can do this easily by following
these steps...
- If you notice you have become self-conscious, (you can usually tell
because you start to feel anxious), choose something 'everyday' you can
see and study it in detail. For example: examine a door, look at the
different textures and shades of colour, wonder about who made it and
how and so on. The important thing is that you're learning how to keep
your attention off yourself.
- If you feel self-conscious in a social situation, it's usually
because you don't have enough to do! Focus on what your purpose in the
situation is. Whether you're there to:
- find out if you like the other people in the situation
- make others feel comfortable
- find out some information
- make business contacts
- and so on...
It's easy to feel self-conscious if you have nothing to do, and much more difficult if your attention is occupied by a task.
Think how comfortable you have been with others when you're all working
toward a common goal. The common goal of socialising could be making
friends, it could be the exchange of mutually beneficial information,
it could be whatever you want it to be!
3) Don't Take Undue Criticism - Even From Yourself !
Challenge your own assumptions. Here's a few to get you started:
- Confident-looking people have bad moments too.
- Just because you feel under-confident, doesn't mean other people can tell.
- If you're saying things to yourself like "You're
no good at anything" then rest assured, you're wrong. Everyone can
compose a sentence, get successfully to the store, eat without choking.
Don't let yourself make sweeping statements about yourself - in the
long run it is this sort of thing that can really damage your self
image.
Building self esteem is not just about thinking good of yourself, it's about not thinking bad for no reason!
- Just because you have felt bad about yourself in
the past doesn't mean you're always going to feel that way. I have seen
hundreds of people surprise themselves once they have learned how to
build self confidence in a way that it stays built!
- Learn how to develop your self confidence by
following the tips from this site and the free Self Confidence Course
and notice the small differences as they happen. Persevere and don't
expect everything at once. Beating low self esteem is a wonderful
thing, and it's much easier than you'd imagine.
About the author
Roger Elliott is a trainer and therapist and author of the free
6-part self confidence course, which has helped tens of thousands
of people and can be found at http://www.self-confidence.co.uk
Home
